Trying to catch my breath

We're finishing up another busy weekend at the Johnson house.  I didn't get nearly as much accomplished as I would have liked to--and I've felt pretty ick.  I've been taking prednisone to treat my poison ivy, and I swear it has turned me into a crazy lady.  (If you don't believe me, ask Isaac!)  Today was my last dose, so hopefully I'll feel like my normal self soon. 

Mark had a teacher workday on Friday, so I was home with Mark till after lunch.  I went into the office for some afternoon meetings, and honestly wished I had stayed home.  Work continues to be a huge source of stress for me, and I'm starting to feel really unhappy there again.  Some of you may remember I had a brief reprieve after I came back from maternity leave, but the honeymoon is over!

I wish I knew what I wanted to do occupationally speaking.  I'm torn between looking at the job as a means to an end (read: paycheck).  But it's a struggle.  I don't feel qualified to counsel (I have my master's degree in counseling) but it would be nice to do something more significant with my time.  To make matters worth, I make a relatively good salary, so changing to a new field would probably mean a significant pay cut for me.  With our very young family--paying off school loans, saving for college and retirement, etc.--it's hard to think about significantly impacting our bottom line.  So, I'm still trying to weigh my options and see what possible paths are ahead for me.  But, in my heart I know I need to do something different.

I've always been a little reluctant to talk about my job here because this is a public blog.  But I need a place to process.  I've always been an extremely high performer getting the highest possible rating.  But the last 2 years I've gotten "average" ratings.  I won't even get into the details, but suffice it to say that it's also impacting my ability to transfer within my company.  I interviewed for a job last year in another department and they asked why my performance rating had gone down over the last 2 years.  I felt like I had been kicked in the stomach!  I explained it as best I could.  But it became apparent that I couldn't transfer until I increased my performance rating... and that can't happen until April 2012 (if it even happens then!).  So, I feel trapped. 

I literally dread going into work tomorrow.  But I will try to make the most of it.  I'll get a few days off--if you can call it that--to go help my twin sister after her new baby arrives.  She is scheduled for a c-section on September 30, but she tends to go early.  So, maybe that will help!?  Goodness... maybe I'll get a break some time?

I could use all the good thoughts and prayers you can spare.  I'm ready to feel less emotionally volatile, and I know Isaac is too!!!  I'm going to go for now.  I've promised myself I am going to bed early.  I only slept a little over 5 hours last night and I'm beat (which also makes me feel worse).  Sweet dreams everyone.

Been a long time...

Hi all. Sorry I've been so slack at posting. We have had an incredibly busy summer selling the condo, then searching for and negotiating a house for us. We moved out of the condo on July 28th and it was pretty bittersweet. We made so many good memories in the condo--it's where we met, dated, got engaged, got married, and then brought Mark home from the hospital. It will always hold a special place in our hearts.

But we are glad to have more space and a yard for Mark to play in. We have a guest room (for now anyway) and lots of room to have company. Please come see us in our new house if you can! It's only about 2 miles from our old condo, so the neighborhood is much the same. And I still live close to my older sister Carolyn. It's so nice to be so close to family.

Mark turned 1 on July 9. We had a birthday party for immediate family at our condo. We had Cooper's barbeque and delicious fixings. Mark likes the birthday cake, but I'm not sure he knew what to do with it... so I ended up feeding a good bit to him. He really just enjoyed having his awesome family around and playing with the giant cupcake ballon we bought him!

Moving was our "vacation" this year, so we'll have to wait another year for a "real" vacation. It was 104 degrees the day we moved, but we survived it with the help of some great movers called TROSA. They are a long term drug treatment center whose mission is to train program participants in job skills while working on their addictions. The money raised on the moving funds the program. It's quite a great service, and the team did a great job moving us. If you need movers in the NC Area, I highly recommend them. They are also incredibly affordable--probably 1/2 the price of most movers.

I turned 35 in mid August and was treated to homemade dinner and cake by my wonderful husband Isaac and his sister Anna. It was also a treat to go to church with Isaac (as Mark's stranger anxiety has made that difficult the past few months). We will celebrate our 3rd wedding anniversary on September 20! And I truly am grateful I get to be married to such a sweet and loving man. Thank you God!

Better sign off for now. I am going to try to do better at posting. If you're still out there, thanks for reading!

Long time no see!

Mark is 11 months old today! I'm not sure where the time has gone. It seems like I was just pregnant and waiting for him to make his arrival! The heat that we've been having the last few weeks reminds me of how hot it was last summer right before he came.


Mark is crawling like crazy, pulling up, cruising along furniture, and standing on his own. He is really practicing the standing these days. It is precious to see him stand, then wobble, get his balance, and then slowly lower himself back down to the floor. He will be walking before we know it! He has 5 teeth and is getting another one on the top. At his last check up (about 10 months), he was 21 lbs 12 ozs and 30 1/2 inches tall. He is growing like a weed! He is still in the 90th percentile for height, and about 50th percentile for weight.

We are working on the sippy cup, and Mark is getting more and more used to it. It's so hard to believe that it's time to wean him from the bottle. But it's also exciting to see him mastering so many new skills. I'm weaning from the breast pump, and will meet my goal of providing Mark 100% breast milk for his first year. That's been a huge personal accomplishment for me. When I went back to work, it gave me great comfort to know that I was still doing something so good for Mark. But honestly, now I'm ready to move on. I'm looking forward to running again!

Sorry for the lack of posts. It's been CRAZY around our household as Mark has become more and more mobile. Just when we think we have the house child proofed we realize there is one more thing to do! Happy summer everyone!

Pictures!

Sorry I've been so bad at blogging lately. Whew there has been a lot going on in the Johnson household. But I'm back... because YOU need pictures of our sweet little man.

Here is Mark at Shelly Lake this weekend. We saw the geese and walked the 2 mile loop around the lake:



We went to visit my twin sister in the DC area over President's Day weekend. Here is a picture of Mark and his cousin Matthew. Y0u'd hardly know Matthew is a week older than Mark! (I guess that's not much in the grand scheme....)

Isaac built Mark another "pillow fort" on our bed last week. Here is a my little Monster in Monster jammers smiling like crazy. Look at all that blonde hair!


And here is Mark at the lake, flying his kite. Isaac handed over the kite string to Mark for a few seconds. So, so cute!

Mark turns 8 months tomorrow. It has flown by. We love our little man so much.

Mark's Baptism

Today was such a special day! Mark was baptized at our church in Raleigh, First Presbyterian Church. The service was so special, and Mark was so sweet throughout. I was a little worried because he missed his morning nap (the grandma's were over playing with him). But he did great. Right before the baptism started, he passed out in his dad's arms. But he rallied and broke a bunch of hearts in the sanctuary. What a sweet little baby we have!

Mark wore the christening gown my siblings all wore at our baptisms. Granted, it was a little smaller than when I wore it at 6 weeks of age! But at six months, Mark looks pretty snazzy in it anyway! And yes, daddy agreed it was okay for Mark to wear a gown just this one day. I don't think he was too traumatized by it either!


Our good friend Alan Jessup served at Mark's elder representative. And also as Isaac's new member representative. Isaac joined the church after attending for 3 1/2 years (and being the middle school basketball coach, and an active Sunday school teacher, and just all around good guy!). He said he'd join when his first child was baptized, and he made good on his word. So it was an especially big day for our family.

Our pastor Ed McLeod performed the ceremony. He also married Isaac and me, and his lovely wife is our Sunday school class teacher. They also live right next to my older sister Carolyn, and have been sweet enough to babysit for us... and store the top of our wedding cake for our first anniversary! You truly could not ask for better friends/pastor/teacher/family. We really do consider them our family.

Ed prayed that Mark would grow to know God better and to be open to how God will work in his life. He reminded us that Mark does not belong to us but to God, and that was such a timely reminder. As his momma I balked at that just a teeny, tiny bit. But I know it's true. And I hope that by keeping that perspective I can free myself up to allow Mark to be exactly who God is making him to be. What better hands could he be in!?

Isaac's mom and sister made the trip all the way from TN. Isaac's mom had to be "rescued" from her house because she couldn't make it out on the icy, snow-covered roads. It was truly a labor of love for Lynn and Anna to make it in (including an attempt at digging a path in the road with a shovel!). We feel so fortunate to have such dedicated and loving family members who made such a journey to be with us on this special day.


My mom made it too. She snatched him up as soon as she walked in the door and only barely let the rest of the family members hold him. They are pretty cute together!


And my dad and step mom also came in. Dad is already enjoying rough-housing with Mark a bit. He better enjoy it now before Mark towers over him in height one day!

So, all in all a great day! We enjoyed lunch at Sitti restaurant a couple blocks from the church. Isaac and I were just talking about how the restaurant where we had our first date, had our wedding reception, and hosted Mark's baptismal lunch are all on the same street about a block and a half apart! We have some awesome restaurants in town!

Have a great week all. Sorry for the lack of posts recently. We'll just call December and the first part of January as the month-0-sickness at the Johnson house. I will try to post some Christmas pics though. We all managed to be well on Christmas Eve and Day at least! XOXO

Mark's First Solid Food and Rolling Over

Hi all. Mark is continuing to grow and develop by leaps and bounds!

After lots of pity from his extended family at Thanksgiving, (everyone felt badly that they were all eating and he wasn't!) we gave him a little taste of pumpkin pie. Mark really seemed to like it. And who wouldn't really? Pumpkin pie. YUM. That's probably the last solid food he'll get for another month or so--we want to hold off till 6 months. But it was neat to watch him register the food in his mouth and see him get it down.

Next, we have a rolling baby in the house! Mark started rolling over this past weekend while we were in Deer Lodge for Nana's funeral. Isaac witnessed the first roll over while Mark was doing tummy time on the bed (supervised, of course). I heard Isaac clapping and wondered who scored a touchdown! (usually that's when I hear Isaac clapping!). But he was clapping for Mark.

Then last night, Mark was doing some tummy time after dinner, and he rolled over again! Isaac did a practice roll with him... and then he did it on his own. Seriously, it was such a sweet site to witness! Mark is developing so rapidly, and while bittersweet, we are so happy to see him grow.

Mark received some Christmas PJ's from his aunt Kathleen that say, "Santa I Believe!" And his personalized Christmas stocking from Lands End arrived... AND a special Christmas outfit from his Grandma Bachl. So, we're ready for Mark's first Christmas!

What a blessing to have this child in our lives. I think I have my Christmas gift for the next million years!

Laura Lucille Belanger Pemberton

Our dear and beloved Nana passed away this morning. We are so, so sad, but are rejoicing in the fact that she is no longer in pain and that she is with her heavenly Father.

(Isaac, Isaac's mom Lynn, and Nana at our wedding rehearsal, September 19, 2008)

She battled breast cancer about 30 or more years ago, and more recently colon cancer. She was diagnosed shortly before our wedding in 2008, but didn't tell us till after our honeymoon so she would not burden us. And truly that is who is was: a person who always put others above herself, and always looked for opportunities to be God's hands and feet in this world.

Nana was born in Worchester, MA. (incidentally also the home of Holy Cross, my dad's alma mater). She served in the Navy as a dental technician during World War II, and that is how she met Isaac's grandfather. They married and had 3 children together, along with another child from Isaac's grandfather's first marriage (his wife died of cancer at a very young age). Nana spent a good amount of time raising Isaac's mom and siblings by herself while his grandfather was on various deployments. They eventually moved back to Tennessee and finished raising their family there.

Nana has taught me so much about love, acceptance, and patience. She was so wise about so many things. Any time I would talk to her about a struggle I was having, she would listen intently and tell me I had plenty of time to make decisions or to find my path and not to worry. God wasn't in a hurry and neither should I be. I can't tell you what a profound impact that made on me. I'm used to wanting to decide, act, and move on NOW (often with not very good results). And she encouraged me to trust the process and listen to how God might be leading me. But above all, there was no hurry.

We are heading to TN in the next few days for her funeral. It will be a bittersweet time, but we will all especially be thankful this Thanksgiving for this amazing woman. Grandparents are seriously one of life's most important gifts. And I am even luckier that I got to call her Nana, even though I just met her a little over 3 years ago.